Enough with the Energy Cloud Menace!

How awesome is having the main bad buy in a film be an amorphous, energy cloud of malevolent will? Not very. At least, not usually. So it’s filling me with trepidation that the Green Lantern flick decided to go with Parallax, represented as a yellow cloud of, um, fear, as the ultimate villain.

Star Trek television episodes had multiple instances of cloud-like antagonists. In fact, too many to go into.

Star Trek the Motion Picture had V’ger hiding in a cloud that made Klingon ships go bye-bye. This movie was infamously boring.

V'Ger

Klingon Commander: Either I'm really high, or that cloud is attacking us...

But worst of all, a terrible, alien force approached Earth once before, and an alien harbinger brings advance word to heroes who must stand against it. That seems similar to what I’m hearing about Green Lantern. However, that was also pretty much the plot of:

Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer

So, um, Surfer...no space pants?

In Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer, Galactus, a menacing dude in purple armor in the comics, was changed to a giant energy cloud because somehow that either was going to be more “realistic” or less corny. However, A naked, silver guy riding a space surfboard was perfectly reasonable.

Once again: boring movie.

So, why go back to the well for another movie about monstrous clouds? Was it to cash in on an easily relatable action figure toy that would set the merchandising world on fire?

Parallax

Green Lantern fighting Parallax...or a dried, glob of mucus.

Not so much. 

I am not overly confident about the quality of this film … but since I haven’t completely given up on Star Trek after watching the original series episodes Metamorphosis, Obsession; Next Gen episode Lonely Among Us; and Voyager episode, hilariously titled, The Cloud, I guess I could still give Green Lantern a chance.

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